Why do gadget fans hate grandmothers so much?

I enjoy a good Twitter row as much as the next geek.

We had a fun showdown this morning with some “unpopular” opinions. Some critical tweets posted about how Google is using gestures on the next version of Android. Some critical replies to those tweets. Rinse. Repeat. Good solid nerd fun, and of course I had to throw my two cents into the fray.

Unpopular hot take:
Significant changes to phone design should have come with more significant changes to navigation than just changing a bottom mounted button to a bottom mounted swipe. Just think, with pressure sensors in our screens, our entire display could be a home button.

— Juan Carlos Bagnell (@SomeGadgetGuy) July 23, 2019

Now, I don’t believe this is a controversial idea. The most dangerous concept here is asking someone to consider the implications of using their phone in a slightly unfamiliar way. Geeks have become some of the most reactionary tech consumers when it comes to the notion of change, but I’ll have to save that for another editorial.

I got a handful of replies. Some folks agreed, some disagreed, but I got a couple of replies that took me by surprise. Not people voicing concerns over their own use, but feigning concern for their family.

That could be noble. I know quite a few gadget geeks who really do worry about how a UI change might affect their family. The best gadget reviewers NEVER belittle a switch from Android to iOS or vice versa. Changes like that can be tough on people. Familiarity matters.

Alas not today. The justification was not pointing out the stress or confusion which comes from change. The big fear was their own frustration in having to deal with non-techie family.

“Use 3D touch as a home button? Yeah, try explaining that to grandmother!”

I don’t know about you, but I happen to like my grandmother, and she’s a tech-savvy lady for her age. She honestly can run circles around a lot of younger consumers on her iPad. I couldn’t help but chuckle at how that scenario might have played out.

Be honest. If you had to get your grandmother a new iPhone, which conversation would you rather have had.

“OK Nana. They got rid of the home button on your phone. I know you have a touch of arthritis, but here’s how you get back to your apps. What you have to do now is carefully slide up from the bottom edge of a slippery phone in one fluid swipe. There’s no tactile landmark to help guide you. You can’t miss the almost non-existent bezel, and you can’t stutter, or it won’t work. If you hold too long at the top of the swipe, you’ll start seeing other apps in the multi-tasking view. I know, that is where the controls USED to live, but those are on the right side of the top of the phone now. Yup. The top is split, not quite in half, and the other larger side is where your notifications are. See? So simple.”

OR

“OK Nana. They got rid of the circle home button on new phones. I know you have a touch of arthritis, but now the whole screen is the home button. It doesn’t matter where you press, but once you feel the screen ‘pop’ it will take you back to your apps. Pretty much everything else is where you remember it, only now the phone scans your face instead of your thumb.”

Phone hardware has changed a lot over the last couple years, but we’re still married to UI and navigation decisions made almost a decade ago. When something like the size or aspect ratio of a phone changes, we try to hold onto older familiar navigation ideas. This often results in over-engineered solutions that don’t work as well as what had before.

But that’s not what makes me frustrated about these online interactions.

We have a bad “gatekeeper geek” stereotype to overcome. When someone eye-rolls about “teaching grandma” something new on a gadget, it leans into that insufferable stereotype hard.

“Ugh. Spend time with an OLD family member, and teach them something I ALREADY know that THEY don’t know about yet?!?!? GROSS!”

I hate sounding like a Facebook meme, but at some point one of your grandparents probably changed your diaper before you were potty trained. You can take the extra minute to help grandma out. Truthfully, it’s probably as much about spending time with you as it is needing help with a new tech widget.

There are a ton of really freaky tech stories swarming the media right now. Net neutrality, broadband privacy, social media manipulation, health and safety topics, anxiety, damage to our hearing and vision, and more.

More than ever, if you’re a tech enthusiast, THIS is the time where you can be the biggest asset to your family and friends. THIS is the time to step up and be a good resource. Now is NOT the time to be an insufferable, eye-rolling, know-it-all.

If YOU’RE uncomfortable with the idea of change, or how our phones might morph over time, that’s fine. Voice those concerns, but don’t hide behind grandma as your excuse.

Grandma’s probably doing fine, but she does wish you would call more often…